This is me doing my Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall impression ...
... with one of the three Gloustershire Old Spot piglets that arrived on Saturday. Yes I know you are all waiting to hear about hilarious stories about how they escaped through my lovingly contructed electric fence and how we had to leg it around the woods Benny Hill style catching them time and time again. Oh ye of little faith! But seriously, how did you know?!
We carried the piglets from the van to their enclosure. Heres something I didn't know before ... that a small little piglet who feels as light as a feather increases in weight by roughly two kilos for every minute he is carried. Also, piglets are perfectly happy to be stroked, scratched, tickled and cuddled, but will scream mega high pitch decibel blue feckin murder the second their little hoofs are lifted from the ground. Once firmly under arm, the ear torture ceases.
So on with plan A. PIglets placed in ark with electric fence hooked across entrance so they can learn that it hurts to touch it, and will recognise it when let out into the enclosure. Plan A fails when piglet takes fence in mouth and happily chews on it, we realise the wooden floor insulates inhabitants from shocks and decide to release them into enclosure with fence switched on. Plan B goes well for 15 minutes ... two pigs get little shocks and form a respect for white tape. Big pig (Fat Boy Slim) gets shock, goes forwards not back, out under fence and under pig house. Other pig (Squeek) can't bear to be separated and follows suit. Dan and I look at eachother with defeated expressions, kids squeel with glee. Pigs caught and replaced pronto. Naughty pig (Fat Boy) goes straight through fence again immediately, pig replaced, repeat 2 more times, remove sense of humour. Dan decides to 'teach' pig fence hurts and holds him under arm ... touches his snout to fence for 3 short shocks. Pig now hates fence (and Dan). Pigs left to it.
Three hours later no more escape attempts. All pigs happily snoofling around enclosure giving lovely soothing constant little grunts. Owners take turns to keep watch until bedtime when pigs are closed in for the night. Its probably more accurate to say, 'the pigs have us', rather than 'we have pigs'!
Update : Sunday evening now and piglings are happily venturing throughout their 200m squared enclosure. No more escape artists! They run to us at the sound of our approach and eagerly roll over to have their tummies tickled.
Dan has had a couple of enquiries about the pig ark he made. He is delighted to talk to anybody wishing to order a custom made pig ark, drop him an email. We never envisaged making pig arks would become part of our income, but serendipities like this are very uplifting. Stay tuned to see the goat house he has been constructing today. Yep I did say 'goats'! More news on that soon.
fantastic blog!!! and amazing piglets! They are lovely well done for keeping them in!
I will be awaiting the next installment with piggy glee :)
I am interested in getting a couple of goats (small) so will be interested to hear about this next chapter in your engaging blog. I think we will be interested to hear how you keep them in, as we have a very large garden but no fences as such...its a problem keeping the chickens in at the moment!
Posted by: caroline | February 18, 2007 at 07:54 PM
ohh, they look so cute. Are you tempted to get the odd sheep so you have your own personal supply of wool tops? I would love a wensleydale longwool (if ever we up sticks and move to the country).
Posted by: Beth | February 18, 2007 at 07:57 PM
Congratulations on your new grunty creatures! They are certainly very cute and will be showing you a good time I think. I'm pleased I can relive the wonderful pig days through your blog now - so cool.
Posted by: VictoriaE | February 18, 2007 at 09:20 PM
Ok, it's a little scary that I know why pigs scream when picked up...basically pigs are, ahem, victims, not predators. Thus, when picked up, they figure they're going to be eaten, so...they scream bloody murder. Let's just say when Elvis starts up, the horses, donkeys, etc., take off running...they figure all that bad news must mean something heinous for them. Anyway, congrats on your new porkers, and LOL on the fencing issues. We started with donks on electric fence...they were within it for literally minutes before they'd escaped...down the road. It was lovely, er, NOT. They were much harder to catch than a piglet :). But we all worked it out, and you do in the end, but I remember how when you're in the midst of animal disaster, it feels like a disaster. Glad all is better!
Goats? Do tell :)
Posted by: Valerie | February 19, 2007 at 12:24 AM
Goats! I keep wanting goats.
The piglets are darling - which they will hopefully grow out of before their impending demise... The adventures are fun to read about though! :-)
Posted by: Tara Larsen Chang | February 19, 2007 at 09:29 AM
Goats! I keep wanting goats.
The piglets are darling - which they will hopefully grow out of before their impending demise... The adventures are fun to read about though! :-)
Posted by: Tara Larsen Chang | February 19, 2007 at 09:29 AM
What an amusing story. I actually ended up burning my dinner because I forgot all about it while reading your blog :-)
Posted by: HildeC | February 19, 2007 at 10:34 AM
Oh my! I laughed so hard that I began attracting attention! :-) Thanks for the Monday morning laugh! Kate/Massachusetts
Posted by: Kate/Massachusetts | February 19, 2007 at 01:10 PM
Great stuff! They're fun aren't they. I'll be moving our 6 piglets to their new home on pasture sometime in a week or so. They've learned to respect the hot-wire in their present pen, but it doesn't stop them from testing it several times a day.
It'll be interesting to see what they do with electric sheep-netting as the only means to keep them in. . . .
Posted by: Podchef | February 19, 2007 at 03:55 PM
They look very cute, how big will they get? Will you (whispers) eat them?
Posted by: Jo | February 19, 2007 at 03:57 PM
They are darling.
I love my goats. Good luck!
Posted by: Phelan | February 19, 2007 at 04:53 PM
Did you know that according to the Chinese calendar, this week begins the year of the pig? If you were born in 1995, 1983, 1971, 1959, 1947, 1935, 1923, or 1911,this is your year. In Chinese astrology a pig signifies intelligence, honesty, strength, and fortitude.
Also, did you know that pigs have the equivalent intelligence of a 3 year old child?
I hope yours get to live long and happy lives.
Posted by: Pat | February 19, 2007 at 06:05 PM
Love the blog. You should join the Homesteaders group on Blogring.com, it's a circle of likeminded folk.
Posted by: an Seanchai | February 20, 2007 at 02:14 PM
The pigs are just so cute, and I love all the beautiful mounds of leaf litter, just glorious.
And goats next how wonderful.
Posted by: Maddy | February 21, 2007 at 08:49 AM
It's so reminiscent of Tom & Barbara Good's 'Good Life'! Nothing I'd like better than having a little livestock on a few acres with a spot of self-sufficiency....ah, someday I hope. In the meantime, we'll do the organic veg delivery service until such time when we can harvest our own.
Posted by: Cheryl | February 21, 2007 at 08:41 PM
Congrats on your piggies! We hope to add some eventually. Goats! What kind? You didn't say---angora for fleece? toggenburg or alpine for milk?
Monica
Posted by: Monica | February 21, 2007 at 09:59 PM
Somehow I managed to miss this post until now. So pleased to see the piggies arrived and happily settled in. Was amused to see the biggest has been christened Fat Boy Slim, as my Mum and Dad have a huge cat who also has this name. Can't wait to hear about the goats!
Posted by: Nonnie | February 22, 2007 at 05:23 PM
LOL! Poor little piggies! They are so darn cute.
Goats will be fun too! What kind are you getting?
Posted by: Cakes | February 23, 2007 at 05:15 AM
Oh my this picture of the cuddling pig, so cute. What is it with pigs they really are so cuddly looking, although I know they nip!!!
SUzie Sews
Posted by: Suzie Sews | February 23, 2007 at 10:49 AM
wow look at those goregous piggies!! So cute and SO funny!! Glad they're settled in well now! And I just loved the bit about them screeching!!
Posted by: Amanda | February 23, 2007 at 04:27 PM